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21st Century Lesbian Trailer Trash

These are the mad musings of a middle aged woman, dyke, nurse, poet. I have a dog, a cat, a mobile home, and delusions of grandeur.

Location: California, United States

Monday, October 02, 2006

Autumn Leaves

My sister pointed out to me that while I was in Hawaii, the 20th anniversary of the plane crash went unremarked by me.

It was a hallmark moment that derailed my life for a number of years. On September 23, 1986 my mother and stepfather took off from the tiny airstrip near Greenbush, Michigan in their single engine Piper Cub. It had been raining for nearly 3 weeks.

Somehow, they landed in a swamp and were not found for several days.

I cannot revisit the trauma that was my life during that period of time. It sent me careening into a wild dive through my unconscious that threatened to submerge me forever. Luckily, I had an excellent therapist.

Today, I am the age my mother was when she died. I had expected to be battling her for another 40 years.

I usually think of them only when I see a movie that I think they might have enjoyed. And from time to time, I ruminate on the implications of living beyond my mother's years.

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