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21st Century Lesbian Trailer Trash

These are the mad musings of a middle aged woman, dyke, nurse, poet. I have a dog, a cat, a mobile home, and delusions of grandeur.

Location: California, United States

Saturday, October 29, 2005

Pissed Off

And I do mean pissed off. Pissed off with that impotent kind of rage that is completely nonproductive. The sort of rage that makes one spin in circles and pushes one to the precipice of a stroke. As is always the case, it is over something supremely stupid.

It's that old game from Wayne Dyer: NIGYYSOB: Now I've got you you son of a bitch. And it is being masterfully played by the nurse who used to be my assistant.

I will not bore you with the long, sad story of her downward spiral into codependent hell. But she is hanging on part time only for the benefits. And she is playing the Olympic games with myself and with some of my new nurses.

Apparently, jealousy and a sense of entitlement factor in to this equation. She is being mean, divisive, and just generally stirring the pot of steaming shit that lies in wait somewhere in any large corporation.

When one of the new nurses called me this morning to tell me what this woman did to her last night, I went internally ballistic. I began to conjure up everything I might do to totally disempower her and force her to resign. Just go away. Leave. And choke on her own smart ass self. I would like to bitch slap her from here to eternity.

Now it does occur to me that if I react as she hopes I will, I will definitely fall into a trap and hang my own stupid self. This type of operation requires stealth, silence, and care in thought and action. My higher self says that if I pray for my enemy for 90 days, she will go away.

My baser self says she can do a whole lot of damage in 90 days. Better to strike quickly and cut out the cancer before it spreads.

In the meantime, if I allow myself to obsess over this situation all weekend, she will have won the battle if not the war. So I'm going to have my nails done. Topped off with a new book and a Starbucks. I think I'll be OK until Monday morning.

Kinja, the weblog guide


Blogger Gina said...

You know se sounds just like a nurse at my in-laws Home health agency. She was mean spirited and loved to stir up the sh*t. They keep her on for seven years and put up with her crap when finally it all hit the fan.

to make the long story short, the IN-laws are selling the business (two buyers bidding) the nurse conspired (unable to prove) to ruin the business, she started deleteing patients files and locking nurses out of the charting programs (with "technical problems") They finally fired her and all the issues went away. It has taken them four months to fix all the charts.

(on an up note, the guy who she "conspired" with hired her on and now the parents get to sue him for $40,000 b/c he signed a contract not to hire any of their key employees for the next year)

It's not always easy to dump the dead weight but some times it's better if you nip that type of thing in the bud before it becomes serious.

4:24 PM PDT  

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