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21st Century Lesbian Trailer Trash

These are the mad musings of a middle aged woman, dyke, nurse, poet. I have a dog, a cat, a mobile home, and delusions of grandeur.

Name:
Location: California, United States

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

The Legitimate Life

A little thought that crept into my head this morning. Someone on my favorite message board asked some questions this morning. When did you first accept the fact that you were a lesbian? How did it change your life? Something along those lines.

Asking me how accepting my sexuality changed my life is a bit like asking me how my life was affected when I, who was born blonde, accepted the fact that I would not be blonde for the rest of my life. It's simply a fact over which I have no control. Of course, it's not that simple but it's the analogy that immediately comes to mind.

The little thought that crept in was this: Am I living a legitimate life? And what exactly is that? Do I get brownie points for being a nurse? Do I get negative points for not having children? How many points, exactly, do I get for the money I donate to charity. As opposed to the number of Sundays I have spent in church?

What makes me a good person? Does paying my bills late send me one step closer to hell?

The question of what constitutes a legitimate life is not something I am prepared to answer at 6 a.m. But it will probably be bugging me for the rest of the week. If I come up with a good answer, I'll let you know.

Kinja, the weblog guide

5 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

My answers to your questions...(not that you asked me....and not that I care whether I was asked)
Am I living a legitimate life? *YES
And what exactly is that?
*LOVING, CARING, SMILING, HELPING, WISHING, DREAMING
Do I get brownie points for being a nurse?
*NOPE
Do I get negative points for not having children?
*NOPE
How many points, exactly, do I get for the money I donate to charity.
*NONE
As opposed to the number of Sundays I have spent in church?
*NONE

~ttt~

6:52 AM PDT  
Blogger Seabiscuit said...

A legitimate life? Well, I certainly am no expert in the game called life, but I can share my opinion. I don't go to church on a regular basis. I have lived in an area that puts much emphasis on church attendance though. But, I've not always been impressed with people I've met that are avid church members. In my humble opinion, how you treat others and yourself is what matters. It is all about the heart. If you are doing something to make yourself look good rather than to honestly help, then your actions aren't legitimate. As for hell, well I don't believe in hell.

I was born a blonde too.

I'm not ready to eat at 6 a.m. much less answer questions. LOL

Hugs!

4:48 PM PDT  
Blogger Seabiscuit said...

Okay, one more thing.

You mentioned not paying a bill on time. Well, some situations aren't simply that black and white. You can't always apply one principle or conclusion to similar situations without first analyzing all the contributing factors.

Let's say woman A couldn't pay a bill on time because the hours on her job were cut back. And, let's say woman B couldn't pay the bill on time because she was spending her income on illegal drugs. These are similar situations, but after analyzing the contributing factors you are able to determine the motivation, which reveals the legitimacy of the person's actions.

Oh good grief...LOL I can't believe I'm typing all of this. Anwyay, I need to do my workout.

This is a good discussion. I should have invited you to Barnes & Noble last Saturday. LOL But, the drive would have been a bear.

5:04 PM PDT  
Blogger John said...

Hi Pam,
You are absolutely living a legitimate life. As a person you far exceed mere legitimacy. What ever you do, you life will count heavily and positively in defense of humanity. If you became jobless, homeless, and friendless, begging and stealing to survive you would still have points to burn. I would not say this about just anyone.
I feel my life is legitimate simply because I enjoy it. If you decide to write more about this I am curious which standard of legitimacy you are using, and if it is yours where it originated. I would love to read the defense or condemnation of your life. Thank you for writing.

8:23 PM PDT  
Blogger Gina said...

pam, what a thought. I have a different take on all that, since I beleive in a reincarnation (of a sort) I don't believe in a heaven or a hell, so I'm less worried of what I do will have on my "soul".

That being said, I think as part of our world it is important to live a meaningful and productive life. I messure this on what impact I have on the people and "space" around me.

I think you have a lot to be proud of, being a nurse is hard, and as long as you aren't "that nurse" that everyone dreads when you're on, I think you are having a tremendous impact on the patients in your care.

I have a young couple in may parent group, 22 and 21, and by trying to guide them to be not only better parents but also better "humans" I really count that as a "plus" in my favor. I've councled ethen to become a pediatric nurse, he starts classes in Nov, and I really think by helping him find his path he will impact the lives of thousands of children.

Kind of a "pay it forward" mentality.

(again sorry about the horrible spelling )

gina

7:44 AM PDT  

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