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21st Century Lesbian Trailer Trash

These are the mad musings of a middle aged woman, dyke, nurse, poet. I have a dog, a cat, a mobile home, and delusions of grandeur.

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Location: California, United States

Friday, September 23, 2005

In and Out the Garbage Pail

Thank you Fritz Perls. This entry has little if anything to do with his book on the origin and growth of gestalt therapy. But it has a nice ring to it. Plus, ol' Fritz really had that Santa Claus thing going on. Who doesn't like Santa?

I believe it was Fritz who said "Life is a banquet and most poor bastards are starving to death." Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong about that. At any rate, perhaps Fritz does have a bit to do with this post. Gestalt is all about the Big Picture; the Whole Person.

My topic is about getting older. I won't say that I am old yet. That would be an insult to those who have charged on through 20, 30, or even 40 years longer than I. It is true though, that at about 35, the body begins to deteriorate in ways we had not imagined. Here are some examples of what happens by 35 or 40.

If you glance down into a mirror by mistake, it looks like your face just fell off. (Thanks Bea Arthur).
You can't hold your stomach in after downing half a pizza.
You can still party hearty. But it's going to take you 5 days to recover instead of one night.
If you have your toddler in tow, some people will begin to ask if he is your grandchild.
You have probably decided to start covering that gray.
You have to work out 6 nights every week to keep those body parts from going south.

By 50, the situation only worsens:

You realize that if you're going to drink that chocolate shake you had better do it in private because you will fart.
Makeup will not hide those wrinkles.
Everyone knows your hair is gray even if you color it.
You start to notice those brown age spots on your hands.
You actually care that you have a 401k plan and begin to study the stock market.
People who are 49 believe that they were born in a different generation than your own.

For a lesbian, it's not so bad that men stop looking at you as a sexual object. It's the part where people stop thinking of you as a person that drives you mad. If you rent Terminator 2 at the video store, the clerk asks if it's for your son. If you go to lunch with a younger male colleague, chances are the 19 year old waitress will not even look at you. Or worse. I once had a waitress give me the senior discount without even asking me if I was eligible. That was a bad day.

Your friends begin to develop things like congestive heart failure, type 2 diabetes, emphysema, and cancer. Menopause begins to make the rounds with a vengeance. You attend more funerals than weddings.

There is something of an elegant sense to this however. Because you begin to see some Truths about life. Whether or not you have regrets, you understand that you are simply who you are. You begin to ask yourself questions like "When I die, for what will I be remembered?" "What have I done to leave the world a better place?"

If you live long enough, you realize, you will outlive your enemies. This means that you can have the last word. This means you can leave this world laughing.

Kinja, the weblog guide

2 Comments:

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Blogger Seabiscuit said...

I had to look up the definition of Gestalt therapy. I like learning new meanings.

Well, I know this probably doesn't count, but if I were waiting your table in which you were occapanied by a man, I would notice you more than that man.

5:08 PM PDT  

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