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21st Century Lesbian Trailer Trash

These are the mad musings of a middle aged woman, dyke, nurse, poet. I have a dog, a cat, a mobile home, and delusions of grandeur.

Location: California, United States

Sunday, September 25, 2005

The Heart of A Woman

It's true that the internet is crawling with crazies. Pedophiles, psychotics, and garden variety personality disorders and sociopaths simply out to take advantage of unsuspecting people. However, I do not believe it is anything more than a mirror on the world at large. In other words, most of the people I encounter on the net are good and honest people.

For almost 4 years I hosted and co-hosted a lesbian message board. It had its ups and downs but it is a community of amazing women. My heart still belongs to Lesbian Life. But I am finding more pearls of humanity on the world wide web by entering the secret life of blogging.

I don't wish to burden you with the saga of my childhood abuse. Just for the record, I don't think it has much if anything to do with my lesbian sexuality. But because of that history, I am drawn to kind and gentle men. John Ellsworth is just such a man. I have been reading his lovely, almost poetic pieces on the important people in his life. They do my heart good. They make me remember what matters most in life.

Apparently, John was raised in the Mormon church. I work for Mormon boys. Most of them are sweet, kind and giving. This doesn't mean they lack cojones. It doesn't mean that all of them are my favorite people. It just means that somehow, the Mormons have managed to raise their boys to have a reverence and respect for the human animal.

Another new favorite is Renegade Mom. She is witty, thoughtful, and insightful. She is doing the most important of Life's Jobs; that is, raising her children. I like it when really smart women take child rearing so seriously. It means that there is hope for the world.

I love Crossing the Great Divide with liberalfeministtranniedyke as well. I have known her for a number of years now and I count her as a friend. If I had not known from the beginning, I don't think I would have identified her posts as coming from someone not born a woman. And I guess that's because she was only male by an accident of a genetic blip on the great radar screen of life. Her heart is the heart of a woman. I am not certain just how far along she is in her journey of transition. It doesn't matter. Her courageous struggle has forged an incredible person.

I have found other pearls of the web. Too many to mention here. But it bears noting that the Heart of a Woman is more than just the female heart. Some people decry the feminization of our culture. Without that feminization, I don't think we will survive.

The Heart of a Woman is the Human Heart; strong but gentle, deep and powerful, mighty and protective, reverent and wise. None of us is born with it. We must all, male and female, grow into such a heart.

Kinja, the weblog guide


Blogger John said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

6:52 PM PDT  
Blogger John said...

Hi Pam,
Thank you for thinking so much of me. It means a lot. I’m glad you are in this world. Not just because you stroke me, but because you impart your strength to your Little Bitches in Training. I think I would have done better if someone had given me bitch training and I’m a white male. Thank you for arming and training my sisters in this world.
I am sure that you know this about Mormon men but I feel compelled to say it anyway. Maybe it is because you put my name in a paragraph about Mormon men having reverence and respect for the human animal. There are some ugly monsters among them. Ok I just needed to say that. Thank you for indulging me. I’m glad you work for the better ones and can see their better sides. There are a lot of beautiful things in that church.
Thank you for talking about the heart of a woman. Thank you for inviting all of us to grow into it. What a beautiful place this world would be.

6:55 PM PDT  

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